I know many of you that read and follow the blog have been praying for Wisdom Tembo and his mother. Of all the kids he is the most needful healthwise of our prayers.
Last time I blogged (June 27th entry)- “Then God will have disappointed me” about his mothers response to if the Lord did not heal him as we were setting a specific time for prayer and his mother to consider allowing him to be put on the ARV’s.
Since that time, over these past months he has continued to decline in his health and needs to be on the ARV’s last year. I had told his mom that we would be coming back right before the new school year to discuss it further and to take him to the clinic to start the medications. She “agreed” though I knew in her heart she did not agree and she would not agree.
So Fanny and Maureen and I went back to visit her in September. We exchanged our greetings and then got right to the point. She of course would not agree to take him back to the clinic and said outright that if the Lord wants to take him now then he can take him. It was so frustrating to see her response and ultimately her lack of concern for Wisdom.
I even said to her, I can not understand how as a mother you would let your son continue to get sicker and sicker if there was a way that you could help him. She was very apathetic to anything that was said. And quite honestly at this point there was nothing more that can be said. ALL of us have spoken to her and pleaded with her. The clinic workers have come to her home and spoken to her and I think even her older children have talked with her on the matter. But as Fanny said when we were leaving, she is like Pharaoh, her heart is hardened.
As I sat on the tiny stool in her tiny house, with only the light from the outside coming in I looked around. Stacked in the corner was charcoal and supplies and things that were bought for her to start up her own business. (A few hundred dollars worth) Hangings on the wall that were gifts given by sponsors of her children. Her oldest son, now graduated from high school, a teacher and enrolled at the University through the help and work of HOPE Kabanana. All these things made possible by the Lord’s blessing to this family. And she stubbornly refuses to let us help her son, to help him live a longer, productive, healthy life.
What more can be said.
Our meeting was very brief, but the conclusion of the matter was that for now, we will stick to what we said several months ago. He will not be sent to school next year as part of our program.
Sounds pretty harsh in one sense. Is it Wisdom’s fault that his mom will not allow him to be put on ARV’s? No it’s not. Not at all. He loves going to school and attends church faithfully. But he might for a time have to suffer even more and “sit out” as we wait and see what his mom does.
She was fine with us saying that we would not be paying for school then next year, but as we discussed among ourselves, he is still in school, he is still part of the program. She might change her mind come January when all the kids are starting back to school with their new uniforms, shoes, and backpacks.
What I can’t get away from is that without being put on the ARV’s, he is going to die of something sooner rather than later. His CD4 count continues to go down, and it is not as if this is lying dormant in his body, he continues to fight sickness all the time. His mom is herself still in the process of dying. And just maybe by us withholding school for a time she might come to her senses and agree.
Yes, I want him to go to school and get a good education, and I want him to be happy. But more than that I want him to LIVE. And one thing I have learned over the year is that decisions, when it comes to people’s lives are not “foolproof”. There is not a manual that says ‘when you encounter this situation in the orphan ministry in Southern Africa then do this’ ...and it will work every time.
We pray for wisdom, the wisdom from above that is, and then we pray for Wisdom.